New baby

This fall a terrible, terrible thing happened.  Through a combination of events that alone would have been okay, together they made the perfect storm that led to poor little Amelia drowning in a toilet.  (She was my only female flying squirrel, you can read about her acquisition in an older post).  I felt so horrible, so awful and so devastated words cannot adequately describe it.

I imagine it might be what it would feel like to accidentally harm or a kill one of your children.  How can you forgive yourself?  How can you keep from seeing an endless loop of the tragedy in your mind and in your sleep?

Since then I have had my two pairs of males, Crunchy and Booger, and the older gay couple, Wilbur and Orville.  Needless to say, none of those guys had expressed any interest in adopting a baby like Elton John or Ricky Martin did so I figured we would just have to put away the baby things and just enjoy the men.

However, once again I was looking on Craigslist and low and behold, there was an ad for a 9 month old female flying squirrel.  Cash only.  I immediately e-mailed the owner of the ad and hoped that no one else had contacted them first.

(This is the actual picture of the squirrel for sale)

Eventually the owner and I made contact and agreed to meet in the parking lot of a restaurant at a mall.  When she finally drove up, I realized it was the same woman I had gotten Crunchy from!   When asked, she fessed up that this squirrel was captive born and bred from a pair her father had stolen out of a tree as babies.  Now I had a quandry, do I support this kind of stupid behavior by paying for this baby, or do I take a stand and not buy the baby?

That was a no brainer.

I handed over the cash and took the little plastic box with a fleece pouch in it.  I did not verify there was a squirrel in there but did feel a little warm body so I was satisfied.  I drove home, on top of the world.

When I got home I took her out to introduce her to her new life.  She is sweet, lovable and very much enjoys her new array of foods to choose from.  I am planning to introduce her to Crunchy and Booger pretty soon. 

I am so happy!   If I were a dog I would express my feelings "by an agitation of my caudal appendage" as the book my date is reading (Campaigning with Grant, written in 1897) described it.

And off we go on a new adventure!

Piglets

I really like piglets.  I like the way the word "piglet" sounds.

Lately there have been pictures of piglets and dogs in the news.

I still like bacon.

Easter Improved

I did not have to go to church. My date flew solo to a local church to "fellowship" while I stayed in bed to do the crossword puzzle.

After that we drove to his sister's house for the brunch. The Easter rabbit that eats children was not in attendance, sadly. There were many small children there and way too much high pitched shrieking for my ears.

On the bright side, there was no geriatric basket hunting and the hash brown casserole was devoured. One brother in law declared it "excellent" and had thirds.

Next we drove to the nursing home. We said, "Merry Christmas!" and "Happy New Year!" as we handed out candy to anyone who wandered near us.

Then we went to the hospital to visit my date's dad. That was fun and uplifting.

It is now 4 PM, time for a nap followed by some Chinese food for dinner. Then it's back on the hamster wheel all over again in the morning.

For a Special Friend

There is always at least one person in your life that no matter how long you go without seeing him or her you know you will always feel like only a day or so has passed because of the bond you have (or you imagine you have) with this person.

And no matter how old you get, you still have someone who remembers part of your life and what you used to be like.

I have a person like this in my life. Holidays always make me think fond thoughts of her because I used to go to the local Kroger and find the baked goods with the most garish hideous colors to bring to her. (This was a very long time ago, that is probably why it is easy to remember now.)

I could always count on violently colored icing on cupcakes but one year I hit the jackpot and found bright red and green yeast rolls at Christmas. I do mean bright, too. I bought them and took them to her house. She snickered and said she would take them to her in-laws for Christmas dinner.

We have known each other while being single, getting married (both of us), having a child (her), changing careers (me) and have always stayed in touch even if it was just a little. I hope we will be friends forever. She is a gem.

Easter

I like Easter. It's spring, things are starting to bud and bloom and it involves candy. What's not to like?

Well, for one, church. My date is "Catholic light" which means he goes to Mass on Easter and Christmas. Being a good spouse I *usually* go with him.

There is a part of Catholic mass where the congregation extends a "sign of peace". (It comes after the collection, of course.) This means you have to smile and shake hands or hug people in your immediate vicinity. I completely hate this. Some people really make a production of it and stretch over two pews to reach you.

When was that hand last washed? Are viral particles stuck on it? Was it recently in the restroom and not washed afterwards? (No question it had just touched money for the shake down part of the mass.) My face frozen in rictus, I hold my elbows close to my body to avoid extending my handshaking arm too far. I can't wait to pull out my little bottle of hand sanitizer.

And Easter brunch is always filled with nasty foods. This year I have been charged with bringing the hash brown casserole. This is a vile concoction of frozen hash browns, cream of chicken soup, onions, sour cream and cheddar cheese. I am going to use fresh grated potatoes but as they say, you can't polish a turd.

On the other hand, there is candy.

I have to admit I am kind of fond of non-traditional chocolate animals for Easter, too. Like this small mouthed frog.

These are 9 on a scale of 1 to 10 for me.

But this is my crack cocaine of Easter candy. Malted milk eggs. My date genuinely does not understand how you can eat an entire bag of candy. He is just that kind of annoying thin person. Many of my close friends understand, though.

I think maybe even Jesus does too because in this picture he is showing his doctor where it hurt after he ate the whole bag of candy.

Happy Easter to you and yours!

Kimochi Warui

"Kimochi warui" is a Japanese phrase. The literal translation is "bad feeling". Kimochi means feeling, sensation or mood. Warui means bad or inferior. It is much more than that, though. It includes "creepy feeling", "feeling oogy inside", etc.

Kind of like Morgan Freeman dating his granddaughter.

Or the movie "Spanking the Monkey".

You know, anything that makes you say "eeewwwww".

But like a bad car accident, sometimes you just have to take a second look to make sure what you are seeing is really as bad as you think it is. And usually, it is.

After many years of lamenting cracked, dry heels no matter how much I pumiced and slathered on heel cream I discovered this nifty little gadget. In less than 15 minutes I had smooth, excellent heels. I have been enjoying them and the increased lifespan of pantyhose for the last few months.

For some reason I opened up the little gadget (you would have to eventually I suppose) and the heel shavings inside looked just like grated parmesan cheese. It was oddly fascinating in a way that made me want to vomit.

Rick opined that it looked like sauerkraut but the bits weren't long and stringy.

So I cleaned it all out and put it in the long plastic bag the newspaper came in and stuck it in the bathroom trash can.

Later I had to take another look. It looked like a little bird's nest made out of coconut. For just a moment I wanted to take it out and save it and make something with it. The possibilities were endless. I could add toenail clippings, hair from the shower...

But wait. No. That would put me in the company of people I would rather not be associated with.

You get the idea.

Take the garbage out!

So I did.